


already got 'em

by thescyfychannel



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, Multi, Sorry Not Sorry, dirk is a brief moment, shark death, they're seadwellers mitchell, this is technically the absolute inverse of your request
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-31
Updated: 2018-07-31
Packaged: 2019-06-19 04:14:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15502083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thescyfychannel/pseuds/thescyfychannel
Summary: when distri's in crisis, it's up to roxy to be the all-knowing font of wisdom.or. it will be.when you're done being the Best Gillfrond ---EBB------ER and he ACTUALLY gets back to you about the seadwellers in his home.geez, you have to do everything around here!!





	already got 'em

**Author's Note:**

  * For [auxanges](https://archiveofourown.org/users/auxanges/gifts).



> "I would love. I would LOVE. To see some kind of exploration of Dirk's home being inhabited by trolls. Namely seadwellers. *winks with both eyes*"
> 
> yeah you're getting "roxy rocks living with 2x seadweller cuties" instead sorry not sorry babe <33

When you first get DiStri's text, it's a lazy morning for you—you've arbitrarily decided that today is Sunday, no matter what the calendar may say—and your two "houseguests" are sprawled out over you like the world's most eccentric air conditioned cats.

The buzzing of a PesterChum notification has Meenah hissing at your phone, and curling up around you, while Feferi contrives to knock it off the bed.

Fortunately for you, her aim's not great when she's sleepy, and she completely misses it.

"So fucking presh," you whisper, delicately propping yourself up on an elbow to grab it. Fortunately, you do not disturb your sleeping sea kitties any more than necessary, and they curl back up and go to sleep.

 

TT: Rox.  
TT: I have seadwellers.

 

It's all you can do not to burst out into laughter. For one, that'd wake your own seadwellers, and for two...well. This is prime picture time.

You carefully settle back down and flip your phone to selfie mode.

 

TG: took ya long enough  
TG: [cuties.jpg]  
TT: Wait what.  
TT: SHIT I need to go.  
TT: That does not mean we're done here.  
TT: I want details when I get back.

 

You snort, and make an attempt to extricate yourself from the pile of frilly-finned lovelies.

 

It does not go as planned.

 

* * *

 

Half an hour or so later, you're cooking fish for breakfast. Having Meenah and Feferi around means that in addition to your pumpkin thievery, you've got a nice assortment of sea snacks, whenever you want...provided that you cook them, and also share whatever you make. You've gotten a  _lot_  better at cooking, really quickly, with all the feedback they've given you.

Besides that, it's...kind of nice, being able to cook for people. Needing to keep the carapacians that scamper around your home fed was motivation enough to go pumpkin thieving, but having two trolls as semi-roommates has been the final kick in the pants you needed to actually get your shit together and start to work on living your  _life_.

(your alcohol bottles are mostly full, these days. except when you try the recipes Janey sends that require a little brandy, or cooking sherry, or that one honey whiskey ice cream dish all three of you had nearly  _devoured_. you think you might try something with the chocolate liqueur and the raspberries and chocolate ice cream you'd pilfered next.)

 

Your gills (hehe) are "trout and about" right now, as Feferi puts it (Meenah had foregone the rhyme for "trout and aboat"), which gives you enough time to finish up your fish dish before they get back from hunting or foraging, whatever they've set their minds to today.

They don't keep you waiting very long. Before you know it, there's the pitter patter of feet up the ramps and suchlike you'd made for them, quickly muffled by towels. They talk in some strange sea-shaped language as they come closer, a very melodious thing in their voices, and you tilt your head, listening to them speak, and enjoying the way they shape their words like waves.

It's really nice.

 _This_  is really nice.

 

When they drop down at the table, beaming expectantly (hungrily), you start dishing out food. "Any luck?"

"Mmmmhm!" Feferi is slightly more restrained than the elder Peixes, but no less eager. Once they've got plate numero uno, you sit down with yours, leaving the  _rest_  of the food in the middle of the table for their grabbing pleasure. "We left our catch in the freezer you put out by the entrance!"

"Good call," you say, and conversation dies off in favor of food. The next time your gills look up, Meenah's already gone through two of the seven fish you'd cooked.

"Shark this tide," she says, a note of pride in her voice. You try not to wince, as you wonder if Janey or Jakey will have any good recipes, or if this is going to be a seadwellers-only dish. "Shore is a big one, too. We barely squeezed that fin into the freezer."

Even with your complete lack of shark-ready recipes, you have to admit—you're a little bit impressed. Some of the crap (carp!) they tangle with is freakin'  _monstrous_ , and that's just what they drag up for you to see. "Not bad. What kind of shark?"

"Oh, you know—" Feferi rattles off some word you don't understand, and Meenah rolls her eyes.

"Naut in that lingo, gillfrond," she says, and Feferi's fins cant down.

"Ship, you're right. Uhhh. I can look it up online later or somefin?"

"Sounds good to me!"

 

You wait until they've both finished each of their three fish to even  _consider_  bringing up the news. This isn't the sort of thing you want to break when your girls have empty stomachs, and you're not entirely sure how to break it at their happiest, purriest, full. It's kind of a tricky wicket, as Jakey would say.

"So, uh," you begin, about as eloquently as you can manage. This is already going  _great_.

"What's on your mind?" Feferi slips out of her chair, and drops down into your lap, stroking over your hair and the curves of your ears in a way that makes you think of how she and Meenah soothe each other with gentle touches over fins. "You've seemed a little...off, actshelly! Since this morning, efin?"

"Yeah, what gives, catfish? Are you tryna hide some ship from us?"

"No! No, nothing like that, uh—" They both look at you, patiently waiting. "—Dirk has seadwellers too."

 

Of all the reactions you expected, finflicking and puzzled speculation was pretty low on the list. "Hmm—you don't sink it cod be?"

"I mean, it shore as ship MIGHT be possibubble. I nebber said it ain't a thing that cod happen."

"I  _did_  think I felt some guppy trout there the otter day—"

"Then yeah, a'course."

"...do you two mind filling me in on this one, or are we playing 'keep Roxy in the dark for as long as possible'?"

They grin at you, Feferi apologetically, Meenah, much less so. "It's not a huge deal," Feferi says, patting your face, all eager to please and make up. "But we think we may know the seadwellers that Dirk has, if Dirk has who we're pretty shore he has. Did he shoal you any picshores?"

You shake your head, regretting your lack of determination to  _really_  push Dirk on the topic earlier. "He didn't, unfortunately. I mean  _I_ sent him one of you two, so really, it's on  _him_  for being lazy and not fulfilling the friend quid-pro-quo."

"Yeah, screw that guy." Meenah's smiles remind you of each and every one of her shark-sharp teeth, and it sends a little shiver down your spine. "No wonder he's infested with Amporas."

"We don't  _know_  that they're Amporas," Feferi says, trying for patience and landing at slightly condescending.

"We don't know they ain't."

You act decisively to avert a possible feud: "How about we call him later and see?"

 

* * *

 

When you do, in fact, call him later and see, it does, in fact, turn out that he has Amporas. It also turns out that he's rather regretting his decision to let them into the household, and that he's already had to patch up  _both_  of them, twice.

Really, he should've called you first thing—you've already got 'em. The seadwellers, the system, the  _rockin'_  new lifestyle—it's okay, though. He's a smart kid. He'll make it work.

And he's got you three, and now Eridan and Cronus, every step of the way.

(or swim, as the case may be. whatebber!)

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know how to do formatting, I don't want to do formatting, but I will totally let you steal my computer and add formatting in a couple of weeks I adore you


End file.
